


Hypnopompic

by seamonster



Series: If sleep is god, go worship. [3]
Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Anxiety Disorder, Family Issues, Fluff and Humor, Healing, Mentions of other characters - Freeform, New Relationship, Non-binary Reader - Freeform, Other, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, a fluffy follow-up, dad 76 for sure, idk my bff zenyatta, not much to put here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-16
Updated: 2019-03-28
Packaged: 2019-10-11 00:28:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,090
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17436389
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seamonster/pseuds/seamonster
Summary: Just a few extras in the realm of Hypnagogic, a look into yours and Genji's budding relationship.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> bc i couldn't resist.

You weren’t sure why you’d been nervous. Historically, you were always a thousand times more likely to be nervous about meeting a new human than a new omnic. Not to mention  _ who _ it was Genji had excitedly dragged you along to his morning meditation to meet. Something deep in your gut just felt… awkward about meeting someone who became so important to Genji after you left his life.

 

But you needn’t have been.

 

Tekhartha Zenyatta was a pool of calm whose soft ripples washed gently over your nerves and put you completely at ease for the first time in a very, very long time. He was like a generator of peace, soothing tranquility his renewable resource, and you just sat there and stared at him like a total creep for a good ten minutes.

 

Unbeknownst to you, Genji had been watching the both of you since you sat down in front of the meditating omnic, only pretending to meditate himself. He wasn’t nervous like you had been, he was just very eager to see how the two of you would interact and get along. You were still as content with silence as you’d always been, and his master certainly possessed a matching penchant for social observation over social interaction. 

 

Sunlight dappled the overgrown grass you all sat in. The bastion unit you’d spotted out there before was, unsurprisingly, still there. It appeared that he’d let an ant colony build a small hill over his foot and was now reluctant to move. The morning was blissful and quiet.

 

You were brought out of your contented haze when Zenyatta finally stirred. His orbs retracted closer to his neck, blue lights on his forehead flickering gently for just a moment. He looked directly at you and said, “you have questions.”

 

“Yeah, do you think that meditating before you go to bed every night really does help with falling asleep, or is it like a placebo effect?”

 

Zenyatta hummed in thought, neither of you paying attention to Genji putting his face in his hands.

 

“If the desired outcome of rest is achieved, does the cause really matter?”

 

Ohhh. You sat back on your feet.

 

“Beyond that, meditation allows us an opportunity to clear unnecessary worries from our minds, that we may slumber without fear of worldly stresses haunting our dreams.”

 

“Okay, you’ve probably got me there. It’s an honor to meet you, Master Zenyatta.”

 

You gave him a small bow. Genji came to sit down next to you, introducing you to Zenyatta. The omnic tilted his head forward slightly at your name and repeated it softly, with an emphasized “ _ the _ ” honorific. Genji nodded alongside you.

 

“It is an absolute honor to meet you as well. Genji has spoken much of you in our time together.”

 

You shook his hand.  _ You _ shook  _ the _ Tekhartha Zenyatta’s hand, you couldn’t wait to tell Jack. 

 

Wait.

 

“He has?”

 

Genji's shoulders stiffened slightly. You couldn't see his face through the helm, but Zenyatta laughed in good humor.

 

“I didn't expect such a thing to embarrass you, my student. They are very important to you, are they not?”

 

Your face prickled with warmth to know that Genji had spoken of you with his master. It was sweet. So you slid a sneaky hand into one of his and squeezed gently. He returned the gesture, voice soft when he replied.

 

“Yes, they are very important to me.”

 

\--

 

“I haven't been here… in a decade.”

 

Casual clothes felt weird against your skin. You missed the weight of your armored jacket, the sturdy do-all of your boots. A simple tee and jeans left you feeling exposed. Which was probably why you were sticking to Genji's side like snot on a wall. 

 

Being in public with Genji was another strange feeling. No mission to focus on, no need to pretend to blend into the crowd. You were  _ part _ of the crowd, both of you. Just a regular person and their regular cyborg boyfriend on a date. A date that Genji convinced Lena to fly you both to Japan for. You know, like normal couples totally do.

 

“Neither have I; I'm so glad they're still in business.”

 

To balance out your nerves, Genji was  _ ecstatic _ to be out with you. On a  _ date. _ You'd both been to this arcade together many times in the past. And back then, he'd always wished they were dates. Very often he'd pretend for small moments that they were. Especially when you smiled at him, or grabbed his hand to drag him to whatever challenge came next. 

 

Now it was very real. And it warmed him from his ears to his cybernetic nerve endings to have you against his side, clutched onto his arm like an anchor.

 

People looked at the pair of you as you entered, but Genji proudly put his arm around your waist and ignored them all. He brought you straight to the token counter, anticipation tingling in his cheeks.

 

Despite his own excitement, he wasn't at all blind to your unease. Trauma had changed a lot about you and he was dead set on making sure you stayed comfortable and had fun. The higher floors of the arcade were never as busy as the main floor, so he took you straight there. You absolutely dominated him in a shooting game, crushing his score with nearly double the points. He made up for it at a rhythm game. It didn't take long to get you to start laughing along with him, the sound of mirth in your voice a long-missed music.

 

By the time you ran out of token credits, there was a considerable amount of prize credits built up between you. None of the prizes caught your eye though. What did catch your eye was a little girl staring longingly at a hoverboard behind the counter. You didn't think twice about giving her your prize credits. Even though you couldn't see it, you could just feel Genji smiling at you. 

 

After you left the happy child, he tugged you into a quiet corner behind some fighting games and wrapped his arms around your waist, holding you close.

 

“I'm glad that hasn't changed.”

 

He said it softly, keeping it between just you two. You weren't sure what he meant and it showed on your face. So Genji chuckled, carefully pressing the front of his helm to your face. You kissed the metal out of instinct.

 

“Your kindness.”

 

He chuckled again as your face burned hot, letting you press your heated cheeks to the the cool plating on his shoulder.

 

“I've always treasured that about you. A lot of people in your shoes could easily lose their kindness, I'm very happy to see yours is still strong.”

 

Hiding against his shoulder became just hugging against him. You wanted to say something nice about him, too, but words failed you. Lost in the choked sea of emotion that had begun crashing into you since your reunion. Thankfully, he seemed to understand and held you all the warmer for it.

 

Before you left, Genji stopped by one last game, a crane game. In under a few minutes, a small toy was falling into the prize slot. It was a pachimari keychain, much like the one he'd given you so many years prior. But this one had red hearts for eyes and you laughed out loud when he dipped to one knee to present it to you. You kissed the faceplate of his helm again as you thanked him. You were going to make damn sure this one didn't get blown up.

 

\--

 

Jack knew something was up right away. 

 

It was pretty rare you actually  _ asked _ to meet. Typically, you just kept tabs on each other's locations and met up whenever it was convenient. Despite the unusual request, though, you sounded… eager? Something was definitely up.

 

There was an old Overwatch safe house in Oregon that you two utilized a handful of times. You asked to meet there. Jack made sure to stock up on munitions and rations before he went, just in case. The safehouse was a cottage in the woods, peaceful and off the beaten path. As he approached on foot, you spotted him out the front window and came to wait on the porch, smiling sheepishly. You looked the most well rested he'd seen in years, some of your former vibrancy breaking through the dark clouds the two of you seemed to live in. Instincts prickled hard, but he fought it down. 

 

He stopped at the foot of the stairs, watching you descend the steps far enough to match your heights.

 

“Don't get mad.”

 

He raised a single brow, not that you could really tell through the visor.

 

“...I went to Gibraltar.” 

 

“Ah.” Yep, he should have seen this coming.

 

“Not for what you might think. I didn't- I'm  _ not _ answering the recall. I don't think.” You fidgeted where you stood, confusion and unease creeping into your eyes for a moment. Jack had to fight down his instinct to coddle you harder than he had to fight down his paranoia. He really deserved all the dad jokes you loved tossing at him.

 

He settled for putting one hand on your shoulder and you smiled, diving straight to the point.

 

“Do you remember Agent Shimada?”

 

“...The cyborg kid, former Blackwatch.”

 

“Right. We're together now.”

 

You said it so very matter-of-factly that Jack was almost confused by your meaning, glancing to the cottage door behind you.

 

“He's here?”

 

“Well, yes, but I mean we're  _ together _ , like, romantically.”

 

Jack was quiet for a moment.

 

“...Dating.”

 

“Yes, I understand what romantic means. What I don't understand is why you called me halfway around the world to tell me.” He regretted it as soon as he said it. Hell, regret clutched him the moment the words started tumbling out of his mouth. Because the flicker of hurt that ghosted over your face felt like shrapnel in a wound. You covered it without hesitation and Jack felt like shit.

 

“...He's important to me. I wanted to tell you because I thought I was important to yo-”

 

“Stop, I didn't mean for it to come out like that, kid. Shit,” Jack grumbled at himself and you watched him with uncertainty as he removed his visor, serious blue eyes locking onto yours “I'm sorry. You're important to me. You  _ are _ .”

 

You stared at him, weighing him for dishonesty. That's what it felt like, at least. Jack shifted his gear into one arm and awkwardly offered the other. Your smile was a relief, stepping off the stairs into a rare hug. He held you up easily with the one arm, heading up onto the porch to get out of the open.

 

You surprised him with a small, light kiss on the cheek as he put you down, voice soft, “thank you, Jack.”

 

He only hummed in response, fighting the nervous urge to snap his visor back into place, if only to cover the blood flushing under his skin. Clearing his throat, he asked, “so do I need to load my rifle before I meet this kid again?”

 

Hearing you snort, eased the last of his nerves.

 

“Your rifle is always loaded,  _ dad _ .”

 

“M'notyerfather,” he mumbled only to himself, knowing he was a lost cause. You were right, though.

 

He let you lead the way inside, taking a moment to put his gear down. Genji was waiting patiently in the living room. His helm and weapons sat on the coffee table in front of him, eyes closed in calm meditation. But they opened quickly when he heard the two of you enter the room, standing smoothly. He'd definitely physically changed from what Jack remembered. His easy smile was also new to Jack, as was the pure affection in his gaze when he looked at you.

 

“Morrison,” he greeted Jack simply, but respectfully, offering his hand to shake. His grip was strong, confident. “I was uncertain we’d ever meet again.”

 

“Yeah, that makes two of us. Life’s kinda funny like that.” Jack spared you a brief, fond look of his own.

 

“I’m glad to see you are in good health.”

 

Jack grunted a chuckle, “you taking a jab at my age, kid?”

 

A very brief look of panic came over Genji’s face, but you laughed it off, punching Jack lightly in the arm.

 

“Ease up, old man.”

 

“Alright, alright.” The springs of the loveseat groaned under Jack’s weight when he sank into it with a long sigh. He’d been on the road for days. “Well, sit down. May as well get this out of the way first so I can get some rest.”

 

Genji sat again, you joining at his side. Jack took a moment to just look at the both of you. It was a weird sort of relief he felt, seeing you as a pair. You’d always deserved better than the life you’d been living, mostly alone. Often when you’d met up in odd safehouses, you looked empty inside. Your body moving and surviving out of trained instinct while your mind checked out for a time. Next to Genji, though, there was light in you again.

 

“It goes without saying,” he started, “but I’m gonna say it anyway. You ever hurt them, physically or emotionally, I’ll make sure there’s nothing left of you for Angela to put back together again. Understand?”

 

“I understand.”

 

“Good. Now, you.” He looked pointedly at you, and you sat up straighter on a long-forgotten instinct. “I know you said out there that you’re not answering the recall, but I think you should.”

 

Jack surprised even himself, but he didn’t let it show, or take it back as you fumbled for words.

 

“What-why?”

 

Jack sighed heavily. “We’ve been doing this for what, seven years, eight? I’ve watched you take shit jobs, make almost-impossible hits, and stare blankly at walls without eating or sleeping for days on end. This life is killing you in the worst way, slowly.”

 

You didn’t respond so Jack went on.

 

“But this right here,” he gestured between you and Genji, “is the most alive I’ve seen you in years. Whatever it is Gibraltar has to offer you, you need to take. Because I’m not gonna watch you waste away. If a sense of security is what you get from them, from him, you deserve to take it. ...You deserve the chance to heal.”

 

You looked at each other long and hard, a thousand more words passing between you in silence, spoken in looks you’d spent years learning from each other. With glassy eyes, you finally nodded, voice too choked to say anything else at the moment.

  
  


Together, the three of you stayed in the cottage until the next day. Jack let himself sleep longer than normal, feeling confident in who he was sharing the house with. You cried quietly in Genji’s arms that night. A cleansing cry, with softly muttered apologies every few minutes for being unable to get a grip. Genji reassured you every time that it was alright to let it out, that he’d hold you as long as you needed, that he was there for you. Before Jack left, you caught him alone again.

 

“Does this mean we’re not gonna see each other anymore?” You asked with a frown. “If I help them?”

 

Jack finished tightening his boots, nabbing his jacket to put on next.

 

“You know how to find me, kid. Even if you just want to see me. I’ll probably still contact you for back-up when I need it, too.”

 

“Promise?”

 

He zipped the jacket up, trying his best to give you a smile.

 

“I promise.”

 

Jack bid you both goodbye, giving Genji one last serious look before clicking his visor into place. He wasn’t worried about you though, for the first time in nearly a decade. And as he made his way out of the state, he noticed, for the first time in a long time, that it was actually a beautiful day.


	2. It's a Shimada Thing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this thing is gonna stay marked complete, but if an idea hits me (like this one did), i'll tack another chapter on. i just can't get enough of these boys. i have a shimada heel.

Despite having never laid eyes on the man in your life, you knew who he was right away. It wasn't just the family resemblance in the face, it was the gait of his walk, the hunch of his shoulders as he moved silently between old containers in the hangar. The way he crouched and peered around.

He clearly hadn't seen you. Which surprised you, really, considering who he was. Then again, most folk didn't tend to look up in the types of places you liked to hide.

A lot of emotions conflicted inside of you as you watched him from your perch. The first was affront, laced with a bitter anger. But it faded quickly. You were too tired for that kind of anger these days. Plus Genji would chide you for it. (While grinning like a dope because, for some reason, he thinks you’re actually cute when you get spicy.)

The second thing you feel is a sense of relief. Genji had been worried for weeks over this very man, _hoping_ for this very chance. It was fate laughing that he wasn't even here for it. But you were, and for Genji's sake you needed to handle this very carefully.

“If you're trying to sneak in, I recommend scaling the cliff under the communication tower.”

The man actually jumped, whipping an arrow out of his quiver faster than you could blink, aiming it directly between your eyes. It was strangely satisfying to know you'd taken him by surprise.

You didn't move onto the defensive, though. You remained lounging where you were, regarding him mildly.

“If you can climb at eighty degrees, that is. The main security feed has a blind spot right at the edge. Athena will still see you, but you won't be caught on any of the feeds, per se.”

He regarded you with a deeply suspicious look, only pulling his bow string more taut.

“It is foolish to reveal your weaknesses to a possible enemy.”

You shrugged in response.

“I've already seen you. What difference does it make?”

You finally moved, rolling to the edge of the container and clambering down with a hint of lazy clumsiness. You ignored the danger pointed directly in your face to ask, “you here to join the recall?”

At the mention of Overwatch, his expression softened and grew momentarily conflicted, before he covered it with cool stoicism. He lowered his weapon, then ultimately put it away.

“I am here to… see someone.”

“This someone got a name?”

A faint flicker a pain crossed through only his eyes.

“...Genji Shimada. He told me this was where I could find him.”

“Genji…” you repeated, you let your eyes trail to the right, looking at nothing in particular. “Right, right, I think he went with Winston and Lena on that recruitment assignment.”

“He is.. not here?”

“Not right now, I don't think. But we can always double check.”

He wasn't on base, you knew that very well. It was hard to sleep at night without him in bed next to you. But you trusted your instincts, and your instincts were telling you to play this at a distance. Genji's brother looked the type to spook easy on emotional matters, and you didn't want to scare him off with the knowledge that you already knew _very well_ who he was and what he'd done. Knew all too well you were standing in front of the very man who'd tried to turn your boyfriend into Swiss cheese (and, overall, succeeded).

You kinda wanted to punch him in the face.

Distance, though. An impartial party was best for now.

“You got a name yourself?”

He hesitated, sharp eyes looking into yours. You perked your brow just a little higher.

“Hanzo,” he settled on saying. Nothing more. Just Hanzo. So, he wanted the distance, too.

“Alright, follow me.”

Athena confirmed Genji's current location for the two of you. Even providing an ETA of the following late morning. Hanzo looked pensively down, considering his next actions no doubt.

“You can chill here if you want. There's extra room in the barracks.”

The look he gave you was curious, frown slightly disapproving.

“You certainly trust easy.”

Again, you offered a shrug. “It's up to you. Just an offer.”

“I could kill you all in your sleep.”

“Do you plan to?”

Your blasé attitude seemed to perplex him, and he sighed.

“Fine, I accept.”

 

You showed him around after that, the barracks, the commissary, the rec room improvised out of an unused conference room. You stayed out of the labs, but found Reinhardt and Brigitte in the gym, lifting weights.

“Hej, hej!”

“Hello!” Reinhardt was always happy to see a new face. You introduced Hanzo to them both, who welcomed him warmly. Even invited him to join them for weight training sometime. He politely informed them that he was just visiting, but you were glad for it. As much as you kinda wanted to shove him off the side of the cliff, you also wanted him to feel like he could be comfortable on the base. If he felt comfortable, he'd come see Genji more, right? You were pretty sure that'd be a good thing. It would make Genji happy, and his happiness was very important to you.

“There are fewer here than I was expecting.”

You and Hanzo were sitting on the concourse of the practice range, finishing up a light lunch you’d grabbed from the kitchens. After you’d made it very obvious that you weren’t going to be letting him out of your sight while he was on base, Hanzo actually seemed to relax a bit. Like he approved of your suspicion, despite your laid-back demeanor. He was a weird guy.

“Hm?”

“This place,” he glanced around. “As I understand it, Overwatch used to be a very large organization. Yet your numbers are now so few.”

“Oh, yeah.” You looked out over the horizon. “We've gained some, and lost some… Not many survived the explosion. Even since then… we've lost more.”

A bitter worm of hatred squirmed in your heart, pulling your expression into one of contempt without you meaning it to. Master Zenyatta's words flickered through the sudden flare of pain, though, and you took a deep breath.

Hanzo was quiet, probably watching you struggle to keep a lid on that part of your heart. You couldn't look at him, though, keeping your gaze on the ocean line.

“You were…” his tone was measured, careful, “part of Overwatch before?”

“Yeah,” you nodded.

“...Did you know Genji then?”

Ah, of course.

Grateful for something else to focus on, your ache eased somewhat as you nodded again.

“Yeah, we worked together a bit. Though answering the recall was the first I'd seen him in almost ten years.” Which was true. As long as he didn't ask if you guys were close, you wouldn't have to lie outright.

He didn't ask. Instead, he nodded and produced one of those gourd-shaped bottles from his bag, popping the cap open to take a swig. Then he offered it silently to you.

You'd never been a big drinker, much less of sake, but you accepted a swig or two.

Or five.

You passed the bottle between you for a while, actually. He was quick to share and you were quick to accept. When you were both much more relaxed and loose of limb, you let yourself have a really good look at him.

Hanzo was turning out to not be entirely like you would have expected. For one, the man looked tired, and not just in body. You recognized the way his shoulders sagged. How he was haunted in all his cracked corners.

“You are staring.”

“I'm observing.”

“Oh?” Something like a crooked smile crossed his lips. “And what do you see?”

“...Atlas.”

His eyebrows furrowed momentarily before your meaning seemed to click, and the bottle dropped before it reached his mouth.

“You have a keen eye,” he said, but his voice was softer. “...You still have not told me your name.”

You doubted Genji would have mentioned you during their last encounter, so you told him. He repeated it in contemplation. You felt it best to break the suddenly sullen atmosphere. You're not sure how well you'd handle it if Hanzo turned out to be a mopey drunk.

“So, how good are you with that thing?”

You nodded down to the bow he'd set nearby. He looked at it, and then at you, lips starting to curl with a haughty smirk that suited him.

“I am good.”

With a slightly swaying gesture to the range around you, you leaned back.

“Prove it.”

He proved it and then some. Swift and precise, he landed a shot on every damn dummy in sight. All headshots. As if he’d not had a single drop of sake. His movements were more than practiced, it was as if the bow was a physical part of his body. The arrows an extension of his soul. It would be a lie to say you weren't impressed. Which your tipsy ass admitted aloud, much to his apparent approval.

That, of course, led to him goading you into grabbing a rifle out of the weapons locker. It wasn't _your_ rifle, but it worked. You traipsed upstairs to the long-range targets, Hanzo following with his bow and a few retrieved arrows.

“A sniper, surprising.”

“What, did you have me pegged for more of a pistol-toting foot soldier?”

“I was uncertain you could shoot at all.”

His smile was cocky, widening when you flipped him a rude hand gesture. You picked the dummy at 80 meters, to start. Before you got down into position, the bottle of sake entered your line of sight. It shook slightly, sloshing the last of its contents, and you looked up at his smug expression. Then snatched the bottle and drank what was left. The alcohol was definitely starting to settle warm around your brain and in your tummy. That didn't worry you though. Only made your joints feel a little heavy as you got down into position.

It was because he was so damn cocky, so fucking confident with himself in his stupid top-knot and midlife-crisis bridge piercing. You took your damn time. Let him wait, let him stew. You had nothing to prove, it was just a pissing contest and you didn’t care about winning.

You apparently waited too long, because an arrow whistled through the air and embedded itself into the dummy's head. You didn't look up from your scope.

“You're never getting that arrow back.”

“At the rate you're going, I probably have enough time to walk all the way to the target and retrieve it before you're ever ready to--”

A single shot broke the air, and the arrow shattered.

“...Decent enough. Though you certainly took your time.”

You sat back with a lazy stretch.

“I'm not in a hurry.”

His eyes stayed on you. “Yes, I've _observed_ that.”

He surprised you by actually offering you a hand up. Didn't need to, but you supposed that was nice of him.

The rest of the day went by fairly amicably. You swapped your typical weapons for simple blaster pistols each and continued your little pissing contest for a while. Neither really coming out on top. Hanzo even smiled a few more times, and cracked _jokes_. His humor was dry and a little self-depreciating. Which wasn’t too dissimilar from yourself. You hated to admit it, and you really did hate to admit it, but he wasn't all that… bad. If you'd never known that he'd once tried to make french fries out of your boyfriend, you’d probably be easy friends. And that was super rare for you nowadays.

You got the feeling it was probably rare for him, too.

When night came around, you went with him back to the barracks. No one actually slept in the barracks. You'd all picked rooms. But you resolved to keep an eye on him, and you were gonna follow through on that.

It took a long time for him to fall asleep, and another small bottle of something more potent than the sake from before. Long enough for the two of you to talk some more.

Not about anything important, just traded stories and contemplations. Compared hit-lists and discussed crappy jobs. You opened the spring of your useless information well, telling him about all sorts of shit you'd read. Eventually, you looked over to find him passed out.

You stopped talking and dimmed the lights as low as you dared, then got comfortable on your chosen cot. You had no intention of sleeping. Not even a wink. You could nap with Genji when he got back. That was always the best. Sprawling out on top of him after he’d removed most of his armored plating? That shit was heaven. Sometimes he’d even play with your hair while you faded into dreamlessness, because he was the best boyfriend alive. You missed him.

And you nearly jumped out of your skin when your communicator silently lit up the dim.

Speaking of the devil.

Reluctantly, but quickly, you ducked out of the barracks to pick up the call. Genji's helm greeted you on the video feed, tilting with a happy little wave.

_“Ohayo!”_

“It's the middle of the night, Gen.” You smiled anyway.

“ _Oh,_ ” he laughed lightly. _“Did I wake you?”_

He knew he hadn't, the little shit. You rolled your eyes.

“Oh yes, from a dead sleep, and I was having the nicest dream. How dare you ruin it.”

He gasped softly, bring his comm closer to coo, _“you were dreaming about me? That's so sweet.”_

It had you snorting. “Who said it was about you? Pretty sure McCree was there, though--”

Genji cut you off with a strangled, affronted sound and you couldn't help laughing.

“Joking, dummy. I've been awake all night, babysitting.”

_“Oh? Did Reinhardt order another keg of German beer?”_

“Nope, an entirely different drunk this time. You might know him. Stand-offish, resting bitch-face, cocky with a bow.”

Genji went silent for a moment.

“He showed up this morning, I caught him sneaking in through the hangar.”

_“You caught my brother sneaking in?”_

“No one sneaks up on the master sneaker, Genji. No one.” You nodded seriously to emphasize your point, but he shot it down easily.

_“I sneak up on the master sneaker all the time.”_

“Yeah, well...” You shifted sheepishly, because he was absolutely right. “You're my only blind spot.”

He paused again, shoulders slowly raising towards his ears in what _might_ have been glee. You really wished you could see his face to be sure, you were terrible with this kind of body language.

“What?”

 _“That was really romantic,_ ” he said softly, causing your face to warm considerably.

“Oh.”

He chuckled, the sound not helping the fluttering in your tummy any.

_“You’re so cute when you’re embarrassed. I am eager to return.”_

“I thought you were eager to go with the others to Rio, too. Is the recruitment not going well?” You asked, trying to shift the focus off of yourself.

He lit up at that.

 _“It has been most successful. There’s a good chance he may be returning to base with us. Master Zenyatta can be very convincing when he truly believes in a cause._ ”

You smiled knowingly, though, something he didn’t miss.

“Have you fanboy-ed at him yet?”

_“I have behaved professionally--”_

“Don’t lie.”

Now you _really_ wished you could see his face.

 _“I did… express my appreciation for his work. He was most flattered and humble._ ”

“I love you, you nerd.”

 _“As I love you, my kind and considerate partner_.” He only said it with a little sarcasm.

Genji promised they'd be back on base by morning. In turn, you promised to continue resisting the urge to maim his brother. After another quiet admittance of love for each other, this time lacking fond name-calling, you hung up.

Hanzo was, thankfully, still asleep in his cot when you re-entered the barracks. While most folk tended to look younger while they slept, Hanzo just looked more tired. Like he carried his ghosts into his dreams with him. Or were they nightmares?

You settled back down on your cot, ready to wait out the night.

  
  
The distress call came early in the morning. Very early. Your comm going off woke Hanzo with a start, his hand instinctively reaching for his bow. The message was from Brigitte and you hurried to the conference room, Hanzo hot on your heels.

A few had already gathered, their attention on Dr. Zhou who was typing quickly, bringing footage up on the screens.

“What's happened?”

“Null Sector has launched another attack in Numbani. They've outfitted a few Bastion Units with new shielding technology. Ohhh, this isn't good!”

On-screen, You could see three of the omnics razing an entire city street. You imagined it wouldn't be long before one street became the entire block.

“We were contacted by an engineer who's redesigned OR15 has been operating as a guardian for the city. But she cannot handle this alone and she doesn't want to endanger local law enforcement any more than necessary, they are not equipped for this kind of attack. She has been trying to get in touch with the UN, but they are moving too slowly. She is asking for our help.”

“And help they shall get!” Reinhardt’s voice boomed in the early morning, but no one was complaining.

Both he and Mei turned to you, then Brigitte. You glared hard at the chaos of the Numbani security drone feed.

“Athena?”

“Yes, agent.”

“Have the Orca ready to fly in fifteen minutes. The rest of you be ready to go in ten.”

You turned to Hanzo. “You too, Legolas.”

 

-

 

You were no stranger to pain. It could even be said, at this point, that pain to you was an old friend. Pain of the body was easily preferred over pain of the heart, but both were keeping you company on the mostly quiet dropship as it rumbled it's way back to base.

“You are careless.”

Hanzo sat behind you, like an annoying pest in your ear. His words weren't biting, though. They were a light reprimand.

“Says the man who left cover to turn himself into a sniper target.”

“She would have shot you in the head, but you were too preoccupied with the one in black to notice.”

You winced at the feeling of another tiny, metal ball getting pulled out of the meat of your shoulder.

“And you could have easily lost an arm.”

“I'll keep that in mind next time, _dad_.”

“Hm.”

Honestly, he was almost as bad as Jack. While Hanzo clearly had minimal first aid experience, his touch was far from light. Every round dug out of your skin stung like all hell. What hurt more was knowing who it was who tried to blast your arm off.

Mei wandered over, clearly exhausted, her hair falling out of it's bun. She smiled empathetically.

“Winston is on line one, he would like to speak to you.”

You nodded and turned your earpiece to the right channel.

“Speaking.”

_“Agent! We've been trying to get a hold of you for over an hour, what happened?”_

You gave him the quick and dirty. How Null Sector launched a heavy, but superficial, attack to cover for Talon’s ulterior motives. With the help of Orisa; Reinhardt, Brigitte, and Mei were able to stop the terrorists, while you had tried to stop Reaper alone, until Hanzo ninja-leaped into the fray and bailed you out. Winston was troubled to hear all of it, but you assured him no one sustained any serious, lasting damage.

Then he passed the comm to Genji, who sounded absolutely breathless with worry.

_“Are you alright??”_

“I'm fine, I promi--” Of course Hanzo had to yank out another round, your voice cracking at the sting.

“No whining,” he chided behind you.

“I'm not _whining_.”

_“What's happened?”_

“It's just a light flesh wound, I'll be fine.”

 _“How bad is it? Was it Reaper?”_ A few nasty things were said that you didn't understand, but you assumed Genji was threatening Reaper with severe bodily harm. It was sweet of him, especially considering you knew he secretly harbored a hope that the man Reaper used to be could still be saved.

Your voice softened, small smile reaching your lips. “Hey.”

He stopped.

“I'll be fine. Getting patched up as we speak.” A hiss escaped through your teeth at one last tug, but Hanzo thankfully informed you that it was the last of them.

“Though my nurse's bedside manner could use some work.”

“So could your ability to weigh danger against the likelihood of success.”

“Did I ask you?” You gave Hanzo a look over your shoulder, he only grunted.

_“I'm afraid he's always been like that. I am glad you are safe. We're about to touch down at base, I'll see you soon.”_

“See you soon.”

When the line went dead, you sighed, ignoring the burn of disinfectant cleaning your open wounds. Biotic cream came soon after, soothing the pain a great deal.

“I admit that your skill with a rifle is impressive. I wasn't expecting as much after yesterday.” Hanzo kept his voice low, like he didn't want the other three to know he found you impressive.

You snorted, gingerly stretching your shoulder and pulling your shirt back on.

“I wasn't looking to impress. Just doing my job.”

“You are very humble for one so skilled.”

“Humbleness has nothing to do with it.” You turned to find his expression serious, though. “But thank you, Hanzo…. And thank you for saving my ass.”

He studied your face for a moment before nodding.

“You are welcome.”

 

-

 

A small group was waiting in the hangar when the Orca landed. Zenyatta was among them, ready to help anyone still injured. Genji was there, too, of course. Hanzo stiffened at the sight of him.

“Something wrong?” You asked lightly, though you were pretty sure you knew.

Hanzo swallowed hard and shook his head once.

“No, but please, excuse me.”

“Of course.”

You were happy to see him only hesitate a little as he made his way over to his brother. Genji did glance your way, but you nodded meaningfully at Hanzo. Honestly, your injury was fine.

Better than fine when you felt a cool, soothing rush wash over your muscles. You looked up to find a harmony orb glowing in gold, floating just over your shoulder. Zenyatta stepped up to your other side, a kind hand coming to rest on your arm.

“I'm glad you all made it back safely. Genji was quite concerned.”

You cracked a small smile.

“Probably because I usually go semi-catatonic around… well, you know.”

He hummed in understanding, both of you looking back towards the brothers as they walked out of the hangar together.

“Are you hungry? I am heading to the commissary.”

“Starving, Zen.”

 

-

 

When Genji and Hanzo joined you hours later, you were relaxing on the only maintained part of the lawn. Zenyatta was meditating nearby and Bastion was picking small flowers that his bird friend kept flying over to put in your hair and make you laugh. It was soothing.

Hanzo clearly had something to say about your languid repose mere hours after an intense firefight, but the words got caught in his throat. Because Genji joined you immediately, flopping onto his side next to you, wrapping you in his arms, and rolling a few feet across the grass while you laughed. Flowers fell out of your hair with each tumble.

He stopped on his back, letting you stretch out and get comfy with a content sigh.

“Missed you,” you mumbled for only him to hear. Fingers sifted into your hair, careful not to knock more of the flowers out.

“I missed you, too, koibito.”

Hanzo cleared his throat awkwardly, reminding you both he was there. Genji dragged you up, pressing his helm to the side of your head as though he was kissing you through the metal. Which he may very well have.

“I know you two have already met, but indulge me. Koibito, this is my brother, Hanzo. Brother, this is my partner.”

You saw several things pass over his face in very quick succession. The disappointment surprised you. Then again, it… kinda didn't. Sorry dude. He composed himself in a quick second, giving you a slight bow.

“An honor.”

You gave him a lazy salute in return, smiling. “It's a something alright.”

When you and Genji later retired to your room to sleep, he teased you relentlessly for somehow getting his brother to develop a crush on you in less than twenty-four hours.

But he played with your hair while he did it, so, still the best boyfriend ever.

  
  
  
  
  
  



	3. Sleepy Bitch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Healing takes time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so i've been having kind of a bad time emotionally as of late. writing for this au helps a bit.

“Do you think goats stargaze?”

You mumbled the question with the edge of a sleepy slur, your face half smooshed against the warm plating of Genji's chest. Said chest jumped slightly as he chuckled in response.

“Are you thinking about that goat again?”

You tilted your face up into his neck, leaving a tired kiss there.

“It was just so small.”

“That's because it was a baby.”

When it had become clear to everyone (pretty early on) that you and Genji intended to share quarters no matter what, Winston recommended you both move into one of the old officer's quarters. The bedroom was much bigger, as were the bed and windows. You'd pushed the end of the bed against the biggest window of all and raised the blinds so you could watch the stars at night. It was a lovely sight from the watchpoint. The vast, endless sky.

“Do you want a baby goat?”

It was your turn to laugh slightly.

“I don't think the others would be enthusiastic about having a goat wandering base.”

His fingers were warm from being pressed against your skin, under your clothes, but he pulled one hand out to lightly brush your hair away from your forehead so he could kiss it. His voice was so very gentle.

“I didn't ask you what other people might think.” The question didn't come across unkind, you recognized the tone well at this point. 

Genji was trying to help you in many ways. One of those ways was helping you recognize whenever you were deflecting anything that might have to do with addressing your wants and needs. You neglected yourself habitually. You cared deeply about Genji and his happiness, but regularly cast off anything that might make you happy, too. Always with the fear of becoming any kind of burden or hindrance in any way. But Genji had made it his goal to convince you that your own happiness was just as important as anyone else's.

You buried your face into his chest again. 

“...Could be nice.”

This was a normal night for the pair of you. Genji holding you for hours while you struggled to fall asleep, talking about any and everything that crossed either of your minds. It was your own soft bubble of domestic bliss, right there in that bed. The thought alone bordered unbelievable. You and domestic bliss in the same sentence.

Yet there you were, cuddled up against the only person you ever loved like this. The only person you ever would. And he was so  _ wonderful _ .

“Are you falling asleep?” Genji whispered against your forehead, pressing another kiss to your hairline. 

“Mhm,” you hummed back, eyelashes fluttering against the metal plating under your cheek. You could feel his faint smile, his steadfast affection for you. It was one of the few things in life you were absolutely sure of. Genji loved you, he didn't just tolerate you. He really and truly loved being with you, even if it meant coaxing you to sleep every night and putting up with a thousand more broken facets of your damaged mind.

You don't recall slipping off into blessed dreamlessness.

 

-

 

You wondered, quite often, if you were becoming dependent on Genji. When you had been wandering, you handled emotional duress and sleepless nights alone. The only company you kept were your own demons, and Jack. Suffering silently because the pain didn't belong to anyone but you.

Genji has convinced you that you can share that pain, much like you'd done for him all those years ago. Slowly, and with great trepidation, you were beginning to loosen your white-knuckle grip on the reins of your life, and he was a  _ huge _ factor in why you were doing it at all. Relationships require work and meeting each other halfway and you wanted to stay with Genji for as long as he'd allow it. So when he told you that it was okay to confide that pain in him, you did. To do better, to prove to him that you wanted this chance at life with him. You could improve for him, you could do almost anything you set your mind to.

However, when he wasn't around, confronting your demons was much harder.

They kept you awake in that big, cold bed while Genji was gone with Lena and Winston. You even rolled into the slight compression Genji's metal body had made in the mattress over time, curling up in it and trying, so hard, to beckon sleep into joining you. It never came. The entire room felt wrong without Genji there, like you weren’t welcome in it if you were alone. Even the window gaped open before you like the maw of a cosmic creature ready to consume you into stardust. 

It had you jumping up to close the slatted blinds tightly.

You could do this, for Genji. You'd already come a long way in healing. Sleeping by yourself was such a small threshold to cross in comparison. You could do it. If you sat there with eyes closed and didn't move, eventually you'd fall asleep, right? Right.

 

Less than an hour later found you tiredly shuffling through the halls, no destination in mind. Everyone else seemed to be asleep or almost to it, only Athena was around to watch you quietly pad down the hallways in random turn. Sometimes crossing through the same hallway twice. Some lights kicked on as you went. It was a… familiar and haunting experience; one that made sorrow cling to your shoulders and back the longer you meandered. As you turned corners, you half-expected to run into the nightly cleaning crew, with their friendly smiles and banter. Or agents with their time zones turned around, looking to burn off energy. Or Gabe sneaking up behind you to smack you lightly on the head with his datapad, his deep laughter your only clue as he disappeared just as quickly--

You stopped dead in your tracks with a muffled gasp, panic spiking sharply, scrambling rational thought as your eyes darted around the hall. You ran into a wall in your rush to find an emergency exit, and fresh air. It was colder outside than you were dressed for, but you hastened to the hangar on bare feet anyway. First you clambered onto a cargo crate, then a bigger one, then onto an overhang with random, forgotten storage covered with tarps. There was enough room between two boxes to squeeze into, under the tarp. Where you could hyperventilate quietly, curling up into as much of a ball as possible. Your ears wouldn’t stop ringing.

The tarp bounced wind away, but cold air still nipped at your skin and toes, numbing them. Time became liquid and meaningless as tears poured silently over your cheeks. You didn’t know how long you planned on staying there. Until morning? Until Genji got back? Forever? What would Genji think, seeing you like this? All the progress he’d helped you make over the months unraveling and slipping between your fingers like water.

Like blood, and ashes. Smoke.

Like running after the man who had been a father to you. He was slipping, too, far beyond your reach. Jesse was gone, Genji was gone, it was just him and you trying to keep up with him. But you couldn’t keep up, didn’t. You failed him. Then, you lost it all in one earth-shaking explosion. So bright, so  _ hot _ . The happiest years of your life seared off in a quick second. It was gone, everyone was gone, there were so many  _ bodies _ \--

“There is chaos within you, my friend.”

Shock and adrenaline alone killed the scream in your throat, something snapping against your instincts, blinding you. The tarp lifted and you threw yourself at the offender, knocking him to the floor of the overhang like a wild thing. Your fist kissed metal with a sharp sting of pain, but it didn’t even slow you down. Your mind was a wailing of alarms, nothing coming into focus as you landed hit after hit, before strong hands finally took you by the wrists. Holding you as you struggled. Maybe someone was saying your name, maybe they weren’t. Everyone you knew was burning, you could smell the charring of flesh and bone, lungs coated in their ash from your haggard breathing. 

You were tugged down closer, a cool forehead touching yours, lights flickering gently against your eyelids seemed to burn  _ so bright _ . A voice warbling out of water reverberated in your mind, calling to you.

_ “Gaze into the Iris, my friend, and experience… tranquility.” _

 

It was unclear how you got back to your room and into bed, but you woke up there. Though, waking wasn’t accurate. You’re not sure you’d been asleep, really. Just… not in your own mind and body.

“How are you feeling?”

You pushed yourself up enough to find Zenyatta sitting near the bottom corner of the bed, in a meditative position. His orbs weren’t circling his neck, however, and he looked almost naked without them. You finished pushing yourself all the way up.

“...Groggy.”

“An unfortunate side effect that can sometimes occur in humans, my apologies.”

You were confused, though.

“What are you talking about, Zen?” As you shifted on the blankets, you realized why the orbs weren’t circling him.

They were circling you, all glowing a faint golden color.

“You… had a relapse. I don’t know what it was that triggered you, but I found you in the hangar. You were most upset.”

His words took a long moment to sink in, then it all came back to you. The sleeplessness, walking, running from ghosts, fight over flight--

You gasped sharply.

“I am so sorry!”

“It is alrigh--”

“Did I hurt you?! I didn’t mean to, I wasn’t--”

Zenyatta leaned to close the distance between you, his hands taking yours kindly, voice soft.

“I know, You were not in control of your actions, and I forgave you from the outset. Do not let it trouble your mind. You caused me no harm.”

Your breathing, which had sped up in guilty panic, took a moment to even out again. Soothing energy washed into you through the orbs, all of your tense muscles sagging. You let yourself fall back on the bed again, one hand covering your face while the other stayed in Zenyatta's hold. Hell, you wanted to cry.

“...I thought I was doing better.”

Zenyatta shifted to lay down next to you. You realized you were on Genji's side, back in the little divot.

“Please do not doubt for a moment that it isn't so. You have done a great deal of healing over these many months, my friend.”

The orbs drifted to float in a soothing circle above the pair of you. Zenyatta's voice remained soft.

“Everyone experiences setbacks, but they are not reflective of how hard you're working to find peace. The progress is still there. You  _ are _ doing better.”

You didn't respond right away.  The blinds were still closed and you righted the blankets as you pulled them slowly over you, curling closer to the omnic. Both of you remained quiet for a while, exhaustion eating away at your bones.

“Zen?”

“Hm?” You felt him turn his head to look at you while you contemplated your words.

“Am I…” It was difficult to arrange your thoughts and you puffed out a breath. “...Everything is so much harder when Genji isn't here. And I'm worried… that I'm only doing it for him.”

“...Doing it?”

You finally turned to him as well.

“Trying to heal.” If he was still absent from your life, you would  _ not _ be where you were, doing anything good for yourself. Of that you were confident. “Like I'm relying on him. That's bad, right? I don't want to burden him.”

Zenyatta hummed in thought and you nervously held his hand a little tighter. 

“The fact that you're aware of it is, itself, a sign that you're aware of the next steps you need to take in your journey. I can assure you that Genji would never consider you burdensome, but it's important that you take this journey for yourself, not merely for others.”

Of course he was right, Zenyatta was rarely wrong about things like this.

“And, if you ever wish to talk about it further, or seek guidance of any kind, I am always here for you.”

You nodded, wiggling even closer to your friend. Both similar and different to the one you were most familiar with, you tucked into his side, resting your cheek lightly against his chest. He didn't seem to mind it any. He wasn't Genji, but he was warm and you could hear processors humming faintly. A soothing sound not unlike a heartbeat. 

“Could you stay tonight?”

A smooth thumb brushed over your knuckles.

“Of course.”

 

-

 

When Genji returned to base, you weren’t in the hangar waiting to greet him like you always did for each other. It was fairly early in the morning, though, you might actually be asleep. Except he didn’t find you in the room either. 

One look out the window eased his worry.

Zenyatta favored meditating in the grass when weather permitted. You were there with him, sprawled out on your back, eyes closed. Just soaking in the sunlight and fresh air. Genji greeted his master with a respectful bow, then approached you, purposefully making his footsteps in the grass noisey. 

His helm he left in a patch of clovers, glad to smoosh his face against your chest.

“Welcome home.”

Genji peeked up to find you looking down at him, a faint smile dancing around your lips. You looked tired but… happy. He leaned up over you, glad to press his lips to yours in a lingering touch.

“I am home.”

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> so yeah, fuck tumblr. if you want to find me, you can do it on twitter: @seamobeemo.


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